Sunday, January 23

How to Dress a Dog Trainer

What do you see in your mind's eye when you hear the term "dog trainer?" 

I see this. It makes me want to hit someone.


If you see a professionally but appropriately dressed, well-presented, emphasis-with-repeated-word-here, professional individual (and you live in Ohio), know that I'm laughing at you. Most of the dog trainers I see look like the guy above and trust me when I say I wouldn't buy a word he said, no matter how right he was.

Because of how he's dressed.

Scratch that. 

Dog trainer, yes. Check mark and all that beside the term. 

Professional dog trainer, no. No check marks, no stars, nothing.

And I certainly would not call you a pet professional.

Every time I check out a new dog training faci--- You know what. Let me rephrase. 
Every single POSITIVE dog training facility I have ever toured has been presented to me by a dog trainer who is, for lack of a better term and because I can think of nothing more insulting than this - sloppy

No offense, but I've worked with the traditional and military boys, and they dress nice
It may be because they're pushy jerks and they HAVE to have some redeeming quality....

What's the problem, here, ladies?


Hair?
Never done. Or if it is, you should sue your hairstylist. There is a hairspray limit, just like there's a drinking limit. Find it.


Makeup. 
If it's there, it's caked on using the incorrect color for your complexion, way too much blush, eyeshadow, mascara, or eyeliner... or it's just not there.
Most of you .... should go without.
I don't care how much makeup you wear so long as all I think when I see it is, "I wish I had that complexion! Her skin glows!" 
Can't pull that off?
Avoid the damn makeup. 
Please.

(These girls are just barely overdressed. Nix the heels, the white, and the sports coats, and you might be on to something.)

Clothes.
Here's my pet peeve.
LADIES, if I can see your panty line, either you're wearing the wrong pants or the wrong underwear and one of them has GOT to go.
I've never been so annoyed or unwilling to listen to someone's advice as I am when someone is marketing to me that they are a professional anything and don't look like they know what the word entails.

Don't worry; your clients think that, too.

You should, 100% of the time, be dressed better than your clients
Especially if you're a woman.
That means: You probably shouldn't be jeans and a t-shirt.
It also means that your clothes should not be baggy or tight enough that I'm giggling because you have a muffin top and should really consider buying the next size up in your so-called pants size.

Really, it's really hard to take a person seriously if she looks like she doesn't take proper care of herself.




So, take the damn time to make your hair look half-way decent. Ponytails are amazing....as long as I can see more than just frizz... and don't require a lot of effort. 
Skip the makeup unless you plan on making it look like you don't have any on. Really. Really, really. Even if you're good at wearing makeup, you should probably opt to look like you're about to teach a dog training class, not out with your friends.
And the clothes. Oh, the clothes. My recommendation: Go with something earthy and professional. And go with top-of-the-line. Cheap dress clothes look like shit.
Repeat: If you're wearing cheap dress clothes YOU LOOK CHEAP.
And top of the line here means that if you're going with earthy, I-am-a-dog-trainer type of clothes, go with Carhartt. If, like me, you work with a very conservative crowd, you may consider Express or Gap or some other annoying name-brand hoo-hah.


(These are Dockers. Dockers are freaking amazing.)


Also, take the goddamn time of day to match appropriate undergarments with the appropriate professional outfits. I don't want to see your bra straps. Or your bra. And while I really, really don't want to see your underwear or panty line, I especially don't want to see your pants riding up your.... 
I'll stop there.

Personally, I recommend Victoria's Secret. They have everything for everyone - size, style, etc - and it's cute to boot. Your husband will thank you.
(You don't want him thanking me. I'm her size.)


Professional is professional, and there isn't some fine line or broad spectrum. If you call yourself professional, dress the damn part.
(Like the irony of having that line right below a Victoria's Secret model? I did!)

Make all the excuses you want. 
Rationalize.
Rant.
Yell at me and tell me why I'm wrong and it's okay for professional dog trainers not to look professional.
Or yell at me and tell me why you think jeans and a t-shirt or the wrong sized clothes and too much make up IS professional.

Point is, this is a professional career, and for people to treat it as such, you really do have to dress better than your clients.
And here's the kicker.
You have to act professional, too.

85 comments:

  1. We are stopping over from Fido and Wino's blog. We had to come over and take a look since we are from Northeastern Ohio too.
    Your post today made me laugh my ass off, reallt it did. You are right one with this! We must see many of the same dog professionals!

    ReplyDelete
  2. I feel you girl!

    A few years ago I attended a seminar for professional dog trainers [kynocongres]. There was a queue to get in, so I took my place at the end of the row and looked around. To my surprise the row consisted mostly of men. In business suits. I was happy that I wasn't underdressed in my skirt and high heeled boots. Looking round some more I noticed another queue, this one was made up of mostly women, in fleece jumpers with doggie footprints on them, jeans and walking boots [bergschoenen] ... I was in the queue for a general pratitioners conference...

    ReplyDelete
  3. Darn, no career as a dog trainer for me than, was looking forward to drop the suit for some wearn off jeans and a t-shirt.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Hahahahahaha! The dog trainers here certainly look nothing like what you have described. I had no idea it had gotten so bad elsewhere. Maybe you need to move to Nova Scotia?

    Or maybe I need to move there. I think it would be a huge increase for my self-esteem.

    I'm sorry.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Am so glad you're back to writing!!!

    Unfortunately, as ever, I am guilty as charged. I am the biggest scruff on the planet. Like, the biggest, worst, shaggiest dame on the planet. Think earthy, muddy, lady-in-the-field crap and worse.

    Super interesting perspective about the military and conservative boys dressing better.

    And good point about how people perceive you.

    I was thinking of having a 'uniform' made for my dog stuff, with my logo and all. I guess that would mean I fall between the cracks, and it will still manage to look somehow professional.

    Am on a massive self-improvement phase at the mo (get up early, don't procrastinate, etc.). I'll have to add hitting the shops at least once every 2 years to my list I guess!

    Love your posts!

    ReplyDelete
  6. Oh, and @Alexandra. I must have been one of the fleece ladies Kynotrain, lol!

    ReplyDelete
  7. @ Jen - I don't know that I'd venture so far as to call them "professionals!" Professionals would know how to dress. I hate to sound vain, but image is everything. The way you look sells someone to your business before your expertise has a chance, so you better take care to make sure you don't look like you just walked in off the streets.
    Ty for the comment. Glad you stopped over!

    @ Alexandra - You know, this happened to me, too. I've learned that the dress of the company (people) attending depends on the speaker, also. When we went to an Ian Dunbar conference this fall, everyone looked ...nice-ish... o_o Or, well, you know what? They tried. That counts. =]

    @ Leo - You know the sad, sick part about this? *You* as a male, can get away with jeans and a t-shirt. They simply have to fit and be of modern-ish style. Guys can pull that off. It's really unfair. lmao

    @ Kristine - I'm glad none of the trainers in Nova Scotia look like that! They shouldn't!!! Damn lazy americans. grrrr. lol. Yes, come over here! But not for a self-esteem boost, for fun and free coffee.

    @ Laure-Anne I like the idea of having stuff with your logo on it. We have fitted shirts (not quite t-shirts,) sweaters, and the like. That way, we're advertising for ourselves everywhere we go. The only bad part is that we have to act ultra professional...everywhere.
    Earthy is a great look for dog professionals! It just needs to be a ...cleaned up version. lol. =] TY for the comment. And I feel you on the scruffy thing. If I wasn't trained so well not to, I'd love to try it. ;]

    ReplyDelete
  8. he he he, I think I have the scruff gene so deeply ingrained it would have to be surgically removed. I wore 16 dollar shoes on my own wedding day because they were more comfie.

    But it's part comfort and part (over?) confidence. I feel really quite comfortable about how I look. It's hard to say this without sounding like an arrogant twit, but I kinda like me so much that I've gone and convinced myself I could get away with the uber scruff look.

    But it's over-rationalising laziness, really. There's no denying I'd be more effective better dressed, so am selling myself short perhaps by not doing it. Who knows? Shall digest this and hopefully take a page off your book.

    But finally, the lazy one in me rears its ugly head and asks: why wear proper clothes when you're going to get jumped on by a bunch of dogs in a muddy field?

    ReplyDelete
  9. Thank you for posting this. I started out doing the dog training business casual look and then winter came and it's been jeans and hoodies. Spring is here and I am realizing my look is inching toward just sloppy. And I used to be a manager at a high end women's fashion boutique! Thank you for reminding me not to let my wardrobe "go to the dogs"

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